


these are the things that could make us official

by rosecolouredjosh



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-06
Updated: 2019-11-06
Packaged: 2021-01-24 03:34:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21331603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rosecolouredjosh/pseuds/rosecolouredjosh
Summary: Dan's listening to the new Charli XCX album and one song catches his attention.
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 2
Kudos: 24





	these are the things that could make us official

When the song started he didn’t give it too much thought, he wasn’t very focused on the album anymore. Was it the 11th? 12th song? Dan couldn’t tell. 

He was more focused on the race Phil was in Mario Kart and trying his best to not give him advice on how he should use his shells to attack and to protect his own butt so he could hit that damn guy in front of him and finally reach first place. They had enough discussions because of said advices, he knows better now. 

In truth, he only got his attention brought back to the song when it reached the end of the chorus.

_These are the things that could make us official_

There was no music as she sang that line and as Dan realised it was a slower song, he decides to start it over so he could listen closely to the lyrics and analyse every little detail as the knowledgeable music critic Dan so deeply believes he is. 

_Hard to read, you could be OCD_  
_You could be bad for me, you could say anything_  
_Sometimes I get a bit TMI, little bit scared of heights_  
_Little afraid to say_

Dan begins to lose focus again. 

As it turns out, being wrapped in a blanket while listening to music on your headphones and sitting next to your boyfriend in the couch as he plays Mario Kart, can be quite distracting for no other reason than it’s just comfortable and so easy to just turn the brain off and relax. He caughts himself before he manages to fully ignore the rest of the song and sits up a bit straighter in order to stay more attentive. 

_You know the things that make me smile_  
_The face I make before my tears fall down_  
_The things that I feel when you're acting suspicious_

It baffles Dan when such silly lyrics like these still gets to him. It’s not like it makes him feel all bubbly with love, that part is more subdued now but Dan can still feel a bit giddy sometimes with these songs.

Whatever, Dan thinks. I like Phil and I still think of him when I hear love songs, so fucking what. 

_You know the place I run to hide  
I take my problems there to work ’em out_

He smiles a bit to himself. It’s been known that Dan likes to go for a walk when he’s having some trouble but something he never really talked about was about how Phil reacted to that. Phil never made him feel bad for wanting to be alone for a while. He was very supportive, actually. Encouraging Dan to do it when he noticed him getting stressed or spending too much time just sitting quietly watching the telly or staring at the walls. 

Whenever Dan arrives home from those walks, Phil will greet him in the living room with a soft smile, a cup of tea and a “wanna watch me play some games while you just lay here next to me and enjoy your tea?”. 

_The things that I say when you don't wanna listen_  
_Things that you say when I make bad decisions_  
_Things that we do by the sink in my kitchen_

That first line reminds him of himself just minutes ago, holding himself back to not make Phil mad at him for trying to teach him how to play. Dan starts to wonder if the whole song is just going to make him feel like a sap for thinking about his relationship with Phil. 

_I remember our first date_  
_No chocolate and no bouquet_  
_But the way that you kissed me_

Images of Manchester in 2009 flashes through Dan’s mind so quickly he feels a bit dazed even though he didn’t moved an inch. 

Shit.

Okay, that hit more harder than it should. 

_These are the things that could make us official_

Dan turns his head to look at Phil. He honestly feels a bit like a silly teenager, getting all shocked and mushy by a love song that somehow relates to how he feels about someone.

But still, he rests his head on the sofa and lets himself look at Phil just because he wants to.

_Look at us, isn't it obvious?_  
_Is it so dangerous? Is it so complicated?_

He actually laughs quietly at that part because, well, here he is just staring at Phil like he’s the best thing in the world and making it very obvious to anyone who could see them that he’s very much an idiot in love. 

But he doesn’t think he can fit the words dangerous and complicated to their relationship. Not now. 

_You know the shapes my body makes_  
_Under the sheets at 4 AM with you_  
_The things that we break when we’re switchin' positions_

Looking back at that time, these were the things that made him realise that… it didn’t matter. 

It didn’t matter what people thought of him, of Phil. Of their relationship. 

It was theirs and no one else's. 

If they were happy together and incredibly in love with each other, why would he spend so much time worrying about what other people would think? Calculating every move he should make in front of a camera with Phil when in bed he wouldn’t think twice about it? It was ridiculous. It didn’t matter and it still doesn’t.

_You know the words to my mistakes  
You understand because you made 'em too_

Phil is, in Dan’s eyes at least, a saint. He can’t imagine how Phil managed to handle all of his outbursts about his sexuality, their relationship, their fans. Dan still has some days where he wants to go back in time and stop himself from saying and doing some stupid things just because he was scared, but Phil never let him go down that thought process.

Always so comprehensive and so calm. And Dan knows that it was just for him, because Phil gets it. He didn’t blame Dan back then and he still doesn’t. 

At that time, everything felt dangerous for Dan and really complicated for Phil.

Not anymore, though. It hasn’t been for a long time. 

_The things that I say when you don't wanna listen_  
_Things that you say when I make bad decisions_  
_Things that we do by the sink in my kitchen_  
_I remember our first date_  
_No chocolate and no bouquet_  
_But the way that you kissed me_  
_These are the things that could make us official_

The chorus starts and ends again as Dan sinks into the sofa and breathes deeply. Phil is still just looking at the TV, so focused on the game that his eyebrows are a little drawn together.

_All of the things that we sometimes forget_  
_All of the dreams that you put in my head_  
_I'm still asleep, but there's breakfast in bed_

Countless conversations about their future and a specific memory about cuddles in bed and three-hour breakfasts runs through Dan’s mind. 

_These are the things that could make us official_

He just smiles and allows himself feel stupidly fond. 

_Maybe the sky might not always be blue_  
_All of my wishes will never come true_  
_It doesn't matter 'cause I’m here with you_

Phil finally finishes the race, puts the controller down on his lap and sighs as he rubs his own face. 

He’s in second. 

_This stuff could make us official  
So tell all your friends ’cause we're goin’ official_

Dan isn’t capable of hiding his grin at those lines so when Phil turns to him, he isn’t surprised to have a pillow thrown at his face. 

“Ouch. I’m not laughing at you, dumbass.” He says grabbing the pillow and putting it over his lap as he turns his whole body towards Phil. 

“Oh, aren’t you now?’ Phil says trying to sound annoyed while trying to hide his own little smile. 

Dan shakes his head, still grinning like an idiot. 

“What’s making you all smiley, then?” Phil asks. 

Dan shrugs. “Nothing.”

But he thinks Phil gets it, maybe because of all the staring Dan is doing. Phil's smile turns a bit softer and the look in his eyes a bit more fond. 

“Alright. Are you going to join me or are you just going to keep staring at me like a weirdo?” Phil says and turns back to the game to start a new race. 

“Phil, we’ve been over this.” Dan breathes deeply as Phil looks at him confused. “I’m weird, I’m a weirdo. I don't fit in and I don't wan—” 

Phil grabs the pillow on his own lap and shoves it in Dan's face.

“Shut up Dan, oh my god.” Phil says laughing and turning back to the game, again. “I don’t wanna play this round with you anymore, I’m playing alone.”

Dan laughs and lets him because he wants to just watch anyway. 

The song ended without him realising and he’s already halfway through another one.

He’s still in the mood, so Dan presses the rewind button and listens to that song again as he lays in Phil's lap while the other starts a race. 

And then, he plays the song again. 

And again. 

And then he gets tired of watching his boyfriend lose for a child who's clearly using hacks, so he turns off the song and grabs another controller to try screw that damn hacker.

**Author's Note:**

> idk how to tag so i simply dont do it, i'm sorry guys.  
if there's any mistakes let me know. <3


End file.
